"I have to go to class, work, take care of the kids, clean the house, and find time to sleep don't have TIME to figure out 'who I am'"
One of the most beneficial things you can do for yourself is work on your identity.
Dr. Joyce Brothers says that "you cannot consistently behave in a way that is inconsistant with how you see yourself"
What this means: if you see yourself as a "fat person" you will not be able to consistently exercise and eat healthily. Those behaviors will only become consistent as a result of seeing yourself as the kind of person who behaves that way. Will power alone is not enough.
What would it mean to you to be able to save hours every day and years of your life in the long run to spend on whatever you choose?
In the 2000's, time is a valuable commodity. We are all stretched thin, and most of us are doing more than we can handle already. So why take a large chunk of time you could be getting things done and explore your identity?
The truth: Your identity is ever-changing and far larger than you realize.
What you do is part of who you are: teacher, lawyer, CEO, salesman, etc. But there is SO much more to you, and it is worth exploring it all.
Once you have a clear idea of who you are, it will change over time, don't let that stop you though, you can always spend more time exploring later.
Knowing who you are allows you to check what you do for alignment. I'm currently working 11 separate jobs which constitutes over 60 hours a week of "working" time. I also volunteer, write, exercise, practice singing, go out with friends, and clean the house, shop for groceries, etc. I don't havea lot of "free" time because I am passionate about what I do, and I devote "free" time to tasks I enjoy.
Because I have a good idea of my identity, I am able to make sure the time I spend is spend on things that bring me fulfillment, and mercilessly cut activities that don't match up.
In the last year alone I've left 4 jobs, parted with several projects and volunteer organizations, and turned down high-paying clients and employment opportunities in order to keep aligned with my identity, and the result has been hours upon hours of time to devote to things that still bring in money, still get the job done, but leave me feelings refreshed, energetic, and enthusiastic for most of the day.
Time is distorted when you are happily engaged in productive work, this state of 'flow' has been extensively researched and documented, it exists, and it makes it feel like you have all the time in the world.
Align with your identity and you can start to feel you have all the time in the world, even when you're working 60+ hour weeks.